Brave (2012)

Directed By: Mark Andrews, Brenda Chapman & Steve Purcell

Rating: PG

Runtime: 93 minutes

Disney and Pixar are at it again with the release of 2012's "Brave," a story about a young girl named Merida (voiced by Kelly MacDonald) who just doesn't accept the rules and regulations expected of the young women of her time. Of course it doesn't help that she also happens to be the Princess of Scotland and thus the term 'lady-like' is synonymous with her upbringing. But let's face it, Merida is anything but lady-like as she goes galavanting off into the forest with her bow and arrow, conducting target practice while her curly red mane is tossed about wildly in the wind.

As a wild child with a stubbornness that cannot be matched, Merida is bound and determined to prove that she's better off left alone when presented with three eligible suitors from other reigning lands. And I have to admit, her prospects are pretty dim and gave me a good chuckle - perhaps in the time of lords and ladies these stories might have been someone's reality... or nightmare. Alas, Merida's mother, Queen Elinor (voiced by Emma Thompson) will not accept her daughter's tempered attitude. As mother and daughter often do, they get into an argument and Merida stomps off into the gloomy night acting like a toddler who had just been spanked.

So life isn't fair... at least in the world according to Merida, where the boys have all the fun and all the non-royal girls get to do whatever they want! And that leaves poor little Merida alone, left to sulk in her self-invented misery. As she walks along an unguided path, she happens upon the shanty of a witch. There's a little double double toil and trouble and all of the sudden Merida is carrying a delectible dessert that will 'change' her mom. What she envisioned 'change' meant I cannot say, but after her mother eats some of the dessert she metamorphoses into a grizzly 1-ton... oops better not spoil the surprise!

"Brave" is a nice story that is fit for the whole family. It will surely keep the children entertained, while the adults may develop a disinterest at both the lack of originality as well as the predictability of the story. There were a few laughing moments that I could count out on one hand, and as a whole, character development was lacking to the point where I had trouble recalling main character names such as Merida. Perhaps that fiery red hair was too distracting!

Thumbs UP 

Skyfall (2012)

Directed By: Sam Mendes

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 143 minutes

"So Mr. Bond, we meet again..."

Back on the big screen is our favorite 007 agent, played once again by Daniel Craig, whom we've seen as James Bond in "Quantum of Solace" (2008) and "Casino Royale" (2006). As we've come to learn from previous films, James Bond is not complete without his supporting team at MI6, including M (Judy Dench) and Q (Ben Whishaw). And let's not forget the leading ladies, Eve (Naomi Harris) and Severine (Berenice Marlohe). Lastly, add a dash of villainy in Silva, played by Javier Bardem, and you're ready to go!

James Bond has been around the block for quite some time. He's well practiced in his trade and appears to make all the right moves - at least that's what we perceive when we watch him in action. But even super agents can be vulnerable, can be damaged, and possibly even repaired. This is our introduction to "Skyfall," where our beloved 007 is thrown from atop a speeding train and plunges into the river, complete with a bullet lodged in his chest. A decision had to be acted upon and M ordered that the shot be taken - and so it was. Shortly thereafter, we find Bond alive and taking shots, alcoholic ones that is, at some island getaway, drowning his woes with the local townspeople. Some time later, upon learning that MI6 had been bombed, he suddenly gets a moment of clarity and rushes back to London. 

A list of agents has been stolen from MI6 and the terrorist group that has it is revealing the identities, resulting in a massive amount of agent deaths around the globe. M is held responsible for the mishap and enlists Bond to help track down the one responsible. Introduce Silva, one of the creepier Bond villains I can remember. No, this man doesn't have steel jaws, doesn't paint women gold, and doesn't have an eye that randomly leaks blood. This man is a psychopath with some very obvious mother issues. His suicidal tendencies make him an even greater risk to the organization, where he is hell bent on seeking revenge on M for being ousted from MI6 some time ago. And let's not forget the scene where he pulls his teeth out and half his face droops down - some kind of chemical exposure thing, but very very creepy. As we've seen Bardem before in "No Country For Old Men," it didn't take much convincing that he would make a fine villain, and that he did. 

"Skyfall" was a surprise due to the fact that it didn't follow the standard James Bond plot formula. This was not a film where Bond is whisked from one end of the globe to the other in order to deactivate a satellite that's going to set off a nuclear reactor in an ocean rift and create the next world war. Instead, the plot was much simpler than that, much more "real" according to Bond standards. As James Bond has taken the toll of what it means to be a veteran agent, so begins a new 007 story. 

Thumbs UP

 

The Tall Man (2012)

Directed By: Pascal Laugier

Rating: R

Runtime: 106 minutes

So, it's been entirely way too long since my last review. Nevertheless, I'm here, back in action - pardon my absence. And now to "The Tall Man," the 2012 suspense thriller thrown in with a little bit of terror and real-life drama. This film surprised me, simply for the fact that it turned out to be everything I thought it wasn't, and I mean this in a positive way.

The film stars Jessica Biel, who plays Julia Denning, a compassionate young woman who appears to be a figure apart from the down and out circumstance of those living in Cold Rock. Most of screenshots that showcase this community include shanteys, trailers, and houses in severe disrepair, complete with yards littered by stray garbage and various other unused outdoor fixtures, presumed to be a permanent exhibit on decoration for all to see. Cold Rock is not a warm, cozy place where tourists gather. And I'm sure the random passerby would probably not give this town a second glance. Unfortunately, these people and their hardships have been left behind long ago. Lucky for this little sore spot, Julia Denning and her husband, Dr. Denning, had made Cold Rock their own kind of humanitarian mission. Although her husband has been dead for some years, Julia never managed to leave the town, and works as the local nurse.

But just when you think Cold Rock couldn't possibly be any more misfortunate than it already is, we learn of the legendary curse that plagues the town. It is said that the Tall Man kidnaps young children and steals them away in the night, their parents never seeing them again. Some are believers, while others simply dismiss the tale as absurd, at least that's Julia Denning's opinion. Her eyes didn't open to the truth of the matter until the night her son was kidnapped by a dark figure, presumably a man, wearing a hooded cloak. In the events that follow, Denning does everything a mother would do to get her child back; she falls off a truck, attacks a dog, breaks through a window, wreaks a truck, and walks injured and half-concious through a creepy dark forest in the middle of the night in pursuit of this madman kidnapper, who we have no idea is human, alien, or some kind of supernatural being.

At this point, the story begins to unravel and take some very pointed turns in an entirely different direction, under the pretense of a motive that I had not seen coming. For the sake of spoilers, I'm not going to say anymore on the subject. What I liked about this film is Laugier's ability to create a tense horrific thrill and then spin it into a series of events that leaves us questioning who's side are we really on? "The Tall Man" was not predictable. It's a film that evolves and transforms itself from one theme into another, and it does so quite effectively. The freedom of choice and the way you choose to live your life is something that we often take for granted. But at what age are we able to make such a choice?


Thumbs UP

The Killer Inside Me (2010)

Directed By: Michael Winterbottom

Rating: R

Runtime: 109 minutes

"The Killer Inside Me" is not for the faint of heart. This film is raw, bloody, and downright grisly. My initial attraction to watching the film was the cast line-up, including Casey Affleck (Lou Ford), Kate Hudson (Amy Stanton), Jessica Alba (Joyce Lakeland), and Simon Baker (Howard Hendricks). 

In its opening scene, we are introduced to the small town of Central City in west Texas during the 1950's - a town of little consequence, where everyone knows everyone... or so they thought. Introduce Lou Ford, played by Casey Affleck, the seemingly do-gooder sheriff deputy who holds a deep dark secret - he's a psychopathic masochistic raving lunatic serial killer! A man with way too many issues to even attempt to unravel and explain, Lou commits a series of murders that appear too convenient and clean for out-of-town detective Howard Hendricks, played by Simon Baker. The victims? A prostitute and the Construction Magnate's son. Appearing as a love to hate relationship that went seriously seriously wrong, Hendricks isn't convinced that the killing was the case of mutual mayhem. As the clues come together, the evidence begins to point to... sheriff deputy Lou Ford. 

In what would appear as a case of clean-cut guilt that should have led to Ford getting the death penalty, we are left wondering how the law is so dysfunctional in this small town and how the hell does this man continue killing? With a beginning that was full of such intrigue and gruesome visuals that made me cover my eyes, the film lost something in its pace. I think it began to drag and left us with the repeating visuals of the 1950's town setting, which if you ask me my opinion, didn't feel much like the 1950s aside from the old-fashioned cars that were parked on the streets. 

Affleck did a commendable job in his role playing Lou the predator. For such an unassuming young man, I was terrified of Lou within the first 30 minutes of the film. What I do not understand is how a man can get away with such leniency and manage to play the system to the degree that he does. Are we to assume that all small towns have a backwards judicial system where people can get away with murder in broad daylight, where they chase their victim down only to have a fellow police officer shoot the victim, for example? "The Killer Inside Me" began as a film with working potential, but managed to fall short of its initial hype. 

Thumbs DOWN 

The Hunger Games (2012)

Directed By: Gary Ross

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 142 minutes

I never did make it to the theaters to see this one, but believe me, I heard all about "The Hunger Games." A few months before the theatrical release, I picked up the novel and gave it a try. The book was interesting and held my attention, just like the film. If you're the kind of person who enjoys a bit of imagination, then sit back and enjoy yourself for this dystopian adventure. 

I always cringe when I hear people talk about how much better the book was than the movie. I love writing fiction and I most certainly love watching film, but I respect the two as being completely different art forms. Providing imagery and character development in a book is much different than shooting it for the screen. That being said, I was impressed with this film adaptation. This may have had something to do with Suzanne Collins' co-writing the screenplay - it's always nice to let the author in on the script just to make sure the story runs smoothly. But let's face it, your average novel has around 75,000 words to come up with a story, whereas the film does it in 142 minutes. Some may have considered this length to be too long, while others too short - I think it was appropriate. 

"The Hunger Games" is the first installment in the trilogy written by Suzanne Collins. After a long period of war and devastation, the United States has broken up into twelve Districts, with a centerfold of wealth and power situated in the Capitol. Each District is responsible for producing or contributing something to the sustenance of the northern territory. Our focus is directed on District 12, the coal miner's district, where people are overworked, hungry, and don't know the meaning of "the good life," for it's been absent for far too long. One family in particular who has dealt with loss and hardship is the Everdeen family. Katniss, played by Jennifer Lawrence, is older sister to Primrose. Their father having passed away in a mining accident, Katniss has taken over the role as the family protector, taking care of her mother and sister who both appear helpless and scared. 

Each year, in order to honor the memory of the war that resulted in this "peaceful" time, one boy and one girl are chosen from each of the twelve Districts to compete in the Hunger Games. The games entail a test of survival as the tributes battle one another in a controlled environment until only one person remains. The Capitol explains that these tributes are a test of honor and sacrifice, but we come to learn that it's more about power and authority, as is the case with most government-type regimes. 

So there they are, all the prospective tributes, gathered together in District 12, waiting for the name to be pulled from the bowl. And the name is... Primrose Everdeen. The chance of Katniss' 12-year old sister being picked is slim, but the realization throws her into a panic and Katniss volunteers to take Prim's place as tribute. Shortly thereafter, she is torn away from everything that she knows and is transported to the Capitol, in a world that reminded me of "The Fifth Element" meets "The Running Man." I'll leave the rest of the film for your enjoyment as you weigh the stakes on Katniss Everdeen and her ability to stay alive long enough to maybe win the competition? 

Thumbs UP

 

Wrath of the Titans (2012)

Directed By: Jonathan Liebesman

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 99 minutes

It's all about the family values in "Wrath of the Titans," the sequel to 2010's "Clash of the Titans." Returning to the screen once again, we have Perseus (Sam Worthington), Zeus (Liam Neeson) and Hades (Ralph Fiennes). With the blockbuster popularity of "Clash of the Titans" I was curious to see whether "Wrath..." could follow suit and continue to strengthen the franchise. Unfortunately, I was left with mixed feelings. 

An avid fan of ancient Greek mythology, I love these kinds of stories - the rabid two-headed monster, the giant Cyclops, Gods and Goddesses, the magical trident, the Underworld, cold steel against molten lava. It's all present and accounted for in this film, but could have been so much better if executed in a different manner. 

The story opens with a view into the life of now humble and ordinary fisherman Perseus and his son Helius. Looking upon his wife's grave, Perseus reflects upon his promise to her that he will be there for their son no matter what. It is apparent that this demigod has thrown in the towel on his fighting days and traded the sword and shield for the fishing pole and bait bucket. We presume that Perseus has gone full-blown mortal, complete with the mundane everyday routine.

One day Perseus is visited by Zeus, who brings some troubling news. Apparently the mortals are no longer praying to the gods anymore. What does this mean? As the Gods become less useful to man, their powers begin to diminish until there's nothing left. And the catch? If the Gods lose their strength, they will no longer be able to withhold all those evil forces they've locked away for so many years - the titans! Zeus believes that Perseus is an integral key to making things right. Exactly why he is convinced of this I'm not quite sure. Yes, Perseus is a demigod, but he's still a mortal man. 

It's at this point in the film where I begin to question what the heck is going on with Mount Olympus. Did I miss something? If I recall correctly, there's a whole hoard of Gods and Goddesses to be called upon in a time of need, but none of them are mentioned in this film save for Hades, ruler of the Underworld, Ares, the God of War, and Poseidon, the God of the Sea. Perhaps this was something addressed in "Clash of the Titans" and I don't remember, but for me this was a major plot hole. 

Moving on, in a scheme to maintain immortality, there is a double cross and all the sudden Zeus is held prisoner in the Underworld. The big plan, Kronos, leader of the vile Titans as well as father to Zeus and Hades, plans to drain Zeus of his power and break free from his bonds to wreak havoc on the mortals. Some of the best moments we get of Kronos occur during a vivid dream sequence of Perseus'. A big molten lava mass that resembles that of a gigantic man, Kronos is not nearly as terrifying as some of the other CGI monsters that we encounter, which is such a disappointment. Sure Kronos is big and has a grumbly voice and makes all kinds of smoke and fireworks, but we've seen it before in the beginning of the film so it's just not as effective the second time around. 

I think "Wrath of the Titans" put too much emphasis in the special effects and too little time in the script. With a "love conquers all" theme throughout the entirety of the film, I had to roll my eyes at times because of the cliche and rather tacky dialogue. Yes, I agree, family is ever-so-important and reconciliation is a great thing. But this is war and when you're up to your neck on the battlefield, you either man up or be put to rest, because adrenaline is about the only thing running through your veins. If I saw a little bit more of this, then perhaps I wouldn't be so reluctant to give this film a thumbs up. 

Thumbs UP

Safe House (2012)

Directed By: Daniel Espinosa

Rating: R

Runtime: 115 minutes

"Safe House" is a film that attempts to outsmart itself with a plot focused on the unethical top secret government wrongdoings that are threatened to be exposed for all to see. It's a plot that we've seen time and time again, where the good guys must battle the relentless government forces in order to expose the truth. A few films that come to mind include "Enemy of the State" and "Conspiracy Theory," where there is a strong focus on hiding or covering up the truth to save the status of corrupt societal elitists.

Overall, "Safe House" is a a film I would describe as a good one-time viewing. With veteran actor Denzel Washington, who plays wanted ex-government liason Tobin Frost, we are sure to be engrossed in his natural ability to take on pretty much any character role given to him. And with much surprise, Ryan Reynolds turns from being the funny man on the screen to that of Matt Weston, the rookie safe house operator who just wants the chance to prove himself in the field.

Well, Matt gets his wish for field experience, and a bit more than he bargained for when Tobin Frost is transported to his safe house for... safe keeping? What ensues involves acts of questionable ethics followed by a raid that results in the safe house not being so safe anymore. Having to act quickly or face an inevitable death, Weston and Frost flee the scene as Weston must figure out his next move, involving Frost's safe transport to another holding facility.

As with most corrupt government action flicks, there is a lot of bloodshed, shooting, and car chase scenes. The adrenaline most certainly is pumping throughout Weston and Frost's escapades to seek refuge without getting killed all the time. Emotions are constantly being tested to their limits, and we believe this as Frost reveals the vile and violent world of Weston's employer, only Weston believes that he's working for the good guys, not the bad guys. So who's on what side and who can you trust? Manipulation, double-crosses, and devious minds are what gives this film its momentum because it makes you think. Yes, actions most certainly can speak louder than words, but understanding the reason behind such actions is what brings out true awareness. If it weren't for Washington, I probably would have passed this film up, but his performance is nod worthy. With some reservation, I give my thumbs up.

Thumbs UP      

Albert Nobbs (2011)

Directed By: Rodrigo Garcia

Rating: R

Runtime: 113 minutes

Glenn Close is most certainly an actress of many talents, which she proves time and time again. We've watched her perform as the psychotic temptress in "Fatal Attraction" and more recently as top-notch hard-as-nails New York City lawyer Patty Hewes in the popular television series "Damages." Now, we get to see Ms. Close in a whole new light for her role as Albert Nobbs, a humble hard-working woman living in late 19th century Ireland. 

"Albert Nobbs" is the story of a woman with a victimized past who decides to take on a male persona and become a waiter at an upscale hotel in Dublin. In a society dominated by the male hierarchy, "Albert Nobbs" explores the world of false identities and hopeless dreams. Nobbs, our main character, has a past that seems to claw at her almost everyday. It's the reason that she has changed her identity and seeks to create a family of her own, complete with a wife - if that's even possible! Through her long withstanding service at the hotel, Nobbs has saved a healthy sum of money, which will be used to open her own Tobacco store. Her fortune will be complete with her vision of a proper partner, a chambermaid named Helen, played by Mia Wasikowska.

Close's performance portraying a man deserves a head nod - my goodness she even sounds like a man! Her facial expressions and general mannerisms when playing Nobbs are effective and gives us a thorough insight as to how plagued and intimidated this poor soul really is. Lips pursed, shoulders straight, and eyes that constantly dart around the room, Nobbs appears to be panicked and scared to death throughout most of the film. This makes sense, doesn't it? A woman playing at being a man would most certainly be a bit paranoid with the ruse. What if somebody finds out?

Not only do we find false identities in this film, but we also see false intentions as Nobbs is baited along by the beautiful Helen, who walks with him only to receive the benefits of luxurious gifts. Helen is a woman attracted to the likes of the bad boy boiler named Joe. Although Nobbs can promise her a safe future, Helen keeps hold of her false hopes to run away to America with smooth talking Joe. If you're the kind of person who hangs onto the happily-ever-after scenario, then perhaps this film is not for you. Just know that the ending is appropriate for the film's tone and everything ends up as it should be, no strings attached.   

Thumbs UP

Easy A (2010)

Directed By: Will Gluck

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 92 minutes

Sit back and enjoy the show. Although I had heard good things about this film, I just now got around to seeing it. "Easy A" is a refreshing lighthearted high-school coming-of-age story, complete with all the awkward incidents and accompanying feelings experienced by everyone who is just trying to fit in. I remember high school and I cringe. I think "Easy A" thrives on such past experiences to let us know that high school takes itself way too seriously, considering its harboring the developing minds of awkward adolescents, which is rather funny when you view the scene years later from your living room couch. 

Olive, played by Emma Stone, is a high school girl who studies, does her homework, has some friends, and as she describes it, sort of blends in the with the student body landscape. There is nothing special about her status, until one day she gets caught in a small lie that turns out to have huge consequences - she tells her best friend that she lost her virginity. Of course gossip queen Marianne, played by Amanda Bynes, overhears the entire conversation and we see how the wildfire spreads via rapid text messaging and whispered conversations by the student body. It doesn't take long for Olive to achieve the status of high school slut. The guys love her while the girls hate her. 

So what's a girl to do when she becomes caught up in this scandalous sex rumor? She can either cry and declare her innocence, or she can do what Olive did - embrace it and reap the rewards. In a funny series of "let's not and say we did" scenarios, Olive agrees to let loose with the high school homosexual who is sick and tired of getting beat up all the time, the high school fat kid who will never be touched by a girl because of his girth, and the dweeb who is too smart and socially awkward to even approach girls. In return for Olive's secrecy, she is offered payment in the form of gift cards and coupons, heightening her slut status to that of a high school prostitute. 

As all good things must come to an end, eventually Olive's "business" catches up with her and the lies become too much. At first she was defiant and scoffed at the normal rules bound to all high school students. Why should she conform all the time? Why can't she be different? But as the shame and harsh words keep coming at her like a full military assault, even the hardest walls will eventually come crumbling down and thus we are left with Olive, a damaged emotional train wreck. How much longer can she keep up the lies? At what time do you admit that you're in over your head and have to set things right? 

"Easy A" is not your typical high school movie. If anything, Olive is a girl beyond her years. She is smart, clever, and usually one step ahead of her fellow peers, which makes her character so likable to us. She's the person we can relate to and a part of me envies her ability to stand out in the crowd, which is surely not a stance that I adopted during my high school years. 

Thumbs UP

Intruders (2011)

Directed By: Juan Carlos Fresnadillo

Rating: R

Runtime: 100 minutes

One of our scary movie night picks, "Intruders" is an interesting tale of a nightmare that is stretched beyond the scope of what we know the word to mean. So, what do we find when we look it up in the dictionary? There are several meanings:

Night mare

(noun)

1. a terrifying dream in which the dreamer experiences feelings of helplessness, extreme anxiety, sorrow, etc.

2. a condition, thought, or experience suggestive of a nightmare.

3. (formerly) a monster or evil spirit believed to oppress persons during sleep.

"Intruders" relies on both the past and the present, where we witness a vile monster, known as Hollowface, that stalks children in pursuit of stealing their faces. There are two children who are haunted by Hollowface - a young boy named Juan who lives in Madrid and a girl named Mia who lives in London. Through a series of events and relatively obvious time change sequences, we gather enough to indicate that the story of the young boy took place some time ago, while the girl's story is in the present. 

So how exactly did this Hollowface monster, who happens to have no eyes or a mouth, come to prey upon these innocent children? In Mia's case, she stumbles upon a small piece of notepaper hidden within the hollow of an old tree. Written on the paper is the story of a man, the story of Hollowface. As she begins to read the story, the once-dormant Hollowface is now released to wreak havoc once again. And this time, he's after Mia's face. 

One night, while in her bedroom, Mia tells her father, John Farrow (Clive Owen) that she's scared of the man living in her closet. In a scene I admit that I wasn't prepared for, as John walks toward the closet we see Hollowface emerge in his dark hooded jacket. Just when you thought nightmares couldn't be real, this one was real and good old dad wasn't going to save the day and kill the monster. Instead, John gets his butt kicked and Hollowface steals his daughter's mouth, leaving her unable to speak another word. Sounds pretty intense huh?

I'm not into spoilers, so I'm going to change gears here. I'm really torn as to whether or not I would recommend this film to others. Clive Owen delivered a good performance as he does with most all the films I've seen him in, so there was no complaint there. And yes, I was hooked into the story of Hollowface, especially when I was unsure whether he was real or imaginary. I enjoy films that have me analyzing every little part, sleuthing my way to figuring out the answer before the big reveal. However, that's not exactly how this film played out. Sure there are thrills and creepy moments, there are points of realization, and there are memories that are reconciled. But in the end, I felt like the story took the easy way out, relying on information we were never even partially exposed to (except for the mumblings of an old priest) that resulted in the culmination of how these nightmares came to exist in the first place. In certain ways "Intruders" was predictable, while in other ways it had me scratching my head wondering how such story elements could come together to form a coherent plot. 

The psychology behind suppressed memories is a subject I know little of, but I guess anything's possible when you put your mind to it.

Thumbs DOWN

Tears of the Sun (2003)

Directed By: Antoine Fuqua

Rating: R

Runtime: 121 minutes

"Tears of the Sun" is a war drama set in the dense, and dangerous forests of Nigeria. After the once-democratic government is overthrown by a murderous crazy dictator, Special Ops Lieutenant A. K. Waters, played by Bruce Willis, is sent to Nigeria with his tactical team to retrieve a doctor (Monica Bellucci) and several missionaries. 

Dr. Lena Fiore Kendricks (Monica Bellucci) will only go with the retrieval team if she can take along her 70 refugees who she has been helping all this time. Lieutenant Waters agrees to her terms and thus the film progresses as a slew of people navigate through the jungle, trying to escape the hellish torture that will be their fate if caught by the new dictator's army. I should mention that the army is actively pursuing them, getting closer by the hour.

As with most war dramas, there isn't much room for comic relief or a moment of pause in this film. There is however, a constant struggle for survival along with the unfortunate circumstances surrounding great loss. The "R" rating is not taken lightly - there are scenes in this film that are absolutely raw and will likely have you end up looking away for a moment or two.

Willis and his unit were well cast, with each personality playing an integral part of the mission. We come to know and respect these men, who are risking their lives to complete a mission that, in all reality, is more like a suicide run. The beautiful Bellucci as the doctor, provided a sympathetic role as she was the one whom all the refugees depended on. Additionally, the romance that develops between Lieutenant Waters and Dr. Kendricks is appropriate because it further justifies the changes we see in Waters over the length of the film.  

A journey for survival is an incredible thing, especially when your emotions get the better of you, which is the case with Lieutenant Waters. He is our protagonist throughout the film, so we feel most inclined to think about him and his situation. His decisions ultimately sealed the fate of everyone on the mission, including his tactical until and the refugees. In the end, I have to say that the film was an inspiration, at least for me. Even when everything seemingly impossible hangs in the balance, there is a way to overcome your obstacles and do the right thing.

Thumbs UP

Haywire (2011)

Directed By: Steven Soderbergh

Rating: R

Runtime: 93 minutes

What happens when you line up a cast of veteran well-known actors to star in an action flick with a well-renowned female MMA fighter? Apparently, not much. "Haywire" is a film that relies on its inherit celebrity to boost its credibility, with a cast including Channing Tatum (Aaron), Michael Douglas (Alex Coblenz), Antonio Banderas (Rodrigo), and Ewan McGregor (Kenneth). Throw in kick-butt super fighter Gina Carano (Mallory Kane) and you'd think there's no way this film could be a bust. Unfortunately, this wasn't the case. 

"Haywire's" plot is a spinoff from that of our well-known female Black Ops Spy "La Femme Nikita." When the organization no longer has a need for you, they figure out a way to frame you for a crime and then dispose of you quickly - no questions asked. This is the fate of our femme fatale Mallory Kane, played by Gina Carano. Her role is to figure out who framed her, why, and exact her own justice for such foul play, although the chain of events that occur during the film don't exactly follow this order. 

To say that the plot is "jumpy" would be an understatement. We are taken from the present to the past, to the distant past and back to the present in a whirlwind of fancy screen effects, complete with slow motion and black and white screenshots. Considering this is supposed to be an action movie, I wasn't prepared for these frozen/slow-me-down camera gimmicks - it just doesn't work with the film's tone. Fighting equates action, which means a lot of noise and a lot of fast-paced camera action, complete with the shrill instrumental back-up that makes our hearts race. 

This is not what we come to experience in all the 93 minutes of "Haywire." Although the fight scenes were as realistic as it gets, there was no momentum leading up to the action - no music and no audio effects. I never tensed or shuddered as glass shattered and faces were struck. Perhaps I am too numb from overexposure to film, but I don't think so - just read some of my other reviews. Emotion is an integral part of a film's success. If we don't feel pain, or sorrow, or fear, then we're not convinced. And if we're not convinced, then certainly we don't believe that the actors are convinced. 

I have to laugh when considering the musical score throughout the entirety of the film, which reminded me of the bumbling 70's style rhythm of the "Kill Bill" film series. Certainly we never took Uma Thurman too seriously in her yellow jumpsuit, complete with samurai sword, a character quite the opposite of Mallory Kane. I applaud Carano in her efforts leading to an up and coming film career. She did a passable job in the acting department, although many times she appears caught in some intense trance with a subtle smirk on her face - a similar look I get when I know the camera's rolling. Her fight scenes I won't even begin to criticize because she's damn good at what she does and has earned every bit of her title. Is it too early to ask for a reboot of "Haywire?" Perhaps the second time around will be the charm!

Thumbs DOWN  

The Pianist (2002)

Directed By: Roman Polanski

Rating: R

Runtime: 150 minutes

"The Pianist" is a war drama based on the memoir Death of a City, accounting the life story of jewish pianist Wladyslaw Szpilman. The film's success took it far in the critic's circle, with Academy Award winners receiving Oscars for Best Director (Roman Polanski), Best Adapted Screenplay (Ronald Harwood), and Best Actor (Adrien Brody). 

If you have any inclination in learning about the past, this is a film that you will not want to pass up. During World War II, the Germans invaded Poland, taking over the capital city of Warsaw. During this time, the jews were separated from the poles as Hitler decreed new rules that progressively took away not only the rights of jews, but their humanity as well. 

This is the story of Wladyslaw Szpilman, played by Adrien Brody. A jewish pianist from a well-to-do family, we see Szpilman's life transform as the German army takes over. How did life change for Szpilman and the other jews? He was taken from his home and moved to the Warsaw ghetto, where work and food were scarce. The new rules set forth by the Germans made it impossible to claim ownership of anything and the ability to hold onto or save any money was a lost cause. Entire families were gunned down, children laid dead in the streets, and families struggled to stay together because that was all they had in the end. 

At one point in the film, Szpilman is separated from his family as they are forced to board a train headed to one of many Nazi concentration camps. Szpilman never sees them again and we can only imagine their terrifying fate. Alone, hiding throughout Warsaw, Szpilman endures a hardship unlike anything I can imagine, for it lasts over ten years time.

There was one scene in particular that will remain brandished in my mind. As Szpilman and his family are waiting to be transferred to the trains, an old man speaks about the horrible truth that awaits them - they're all going to die. He talks about rising up against the Nazis, for surely their numbers outweighed those of the Germans. But no action is taken and we think about the old man's words. Why not fight back? These soldiers were the ones who killed their friends and family, beat them, swore at them, took away their rights, took away their livelihood and looked upon them as the scum of the Earth. After all this... what do you do when there's no fight left in you - when all you can focus on is your survival? This is the story of Wladyslaw Szpilman.

Thumbs UP

Young Adult (2011)

Directed By: Jason Reitman

Rating: R

Runtime: 94 minutes

Some people actually believe that the grass is always greener on the other side. This is the case for 37-year old Mavis Gary (Charlize Theron), a would-be fiction novelist with an obsession of her long passed high school years, for these years it appears, were the best of her life. 

It is my understanding from perusing various external reviews, that some viewers were expecting a large dose of comedy from this film - disappointment may have been what they got instead, for this film is not a comedy. It's a bit depressing in a way and hits too close to home in other ways. It's rather weird at times and downright shocking at others. In summary, "Young Adult" is about a woman's misguided perception of what she both wants and needs in life, and how she will overcome such obstacles. 

Working on the final book of a once-popular young adult reading series, Mavis Gary appears stuck. We see her in her quaint Minneapolis apartment furnished with pieces you might find in a typical college dorm. Practically falling out of bed in the morning after a one-night stand, Mavis takes off her stick-on silicone bra fillers and immediately heads toward the fridge to chug a portion of her 2-liter diet Coke. What can we gather from these initial scenes? Mavis is sloppy, unhealthy, and doesn't appear to have much self-respect.

One day while working on her novel, she receives an email from her high-school ex-boyfriend and his wife announcing the birth of their daughter. This email disturbs Mavis in such a way that on no level should be considered normal. Shortly thereafter, Mavis packs a quick suitcase and the dog carrier, setting off for Mercury, Minnesota, her hometown. This kind of reminded me of the incident with the Astronaut love triangle that took place in Florida some time ago, remember that? Mavis' intentions are not good. She is convinced, I'm not exactly sure how, that her long-ago ex-boyfriend and now married man Buddy Slade, played by Patrick Stewart, is unhappy and will want to run away with her. It is her job to convince him to accept that they are meant to be together so that, well... they can live happily ever after. The end. 

I'd like to mention that there is an interesting dynamic in this film where Mavis is working on her novel, creating and developing characters as it relates to her own life. Just like the main character in her novels, Mavis sees herself as a tortured victim who deserves no ill will and all the happiness in the world. But alas, I'm afraid in her world, the glass will always be half empty. This film is a bit odd and not at all very memorable because let's face it, Mavis is a stone-cold bitch on a path of desperation and denial. 

Thumbs DOWN

Warrior (2011)

Directed By: Gavin O'Connor

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 140 minutes

Let me start out by saying that I am not a fan of Mixed Martial Arts and I had my reservations before watching this film. I am so glad that I decided against my initial prejudice and gave it a try - I was not disappointed. 

"Warrior" is a film centered on a story about a badly broken family and their struggle to overcome their personal obstacles. Brendan Conlon and Tommy Conlon, played by Joel Edgerton and Tom Hardy, grew up in a household with an abusive alcoholic father, Paddy Conlon, played by Nick Nolte. Getting out of the situation, Brendan and Tommy took separate paths - Brendan ran off with his high school sweetheart while Tommy ran away with his mother, who became terminally ill some time later. 

The film begins in the cold aftermath of life in the boys' adulthood. Paddy is no longer an alcoholic. He is 1,000 days sober and will spend the rest of his life asking forgiveness for his sins. Older brother Brendan is a high school physics teacher with a wife and two daughters. Younger brother Tommy takes pills and appears to be a free rider, having no permanent address or place in this world.

Each character in this film sets after their own personal sense of retribution. Paddy was a deadbeat father who singlehandedly tore apart the best thing in his life - his family. Now he is faced with putting the broken pieces back together, if that's even possible. Brendan was always the underdog in his father's eyes, not the champion like Tommy. After supporting his family in a way that his father never could, Brendan is now faced with a bank foreclosure on his home and he'd do anything to not let that happen. After Tommy's military unit was erased by friendly fire, Tommy went AWOL, promising to do right by his military comrade's widow. 

Each of these hardships is brought together by one singular competition - the Spartan Mixed Martial Arts tournament, boasting a 5 million dollar purse. I will not reveal anything more about the tournament, for it is best viewed from a non-biased audience. I will say that the fighting was well-choreographed and just about as realistic as it gets, although I have no desire to personally verify this statement. Edgerton plays a great underdog and a convincing role of the shamed older brother, while Hardy delivers an excellent performance of a man so damaged and fueled by hate, I imagine that I would be scared to death fighting with him in the ring, even if it was just acting!

This film goes through a range of emotions and I found myself taking turns sympathizing or getting angry with one character to the next. It is much easier to forgive than it is to forget, a lesson we come to learn well after watching this film.

Thumbs UP

Fire in the Sky (1993)

Directed By: Robert Lieberman

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 109 minutes

"Fire in the Sky" is a science fiction thriller based on a true story, of which I have no research knowledge at this time. This review will stick to the facts... of the film and only the film. 

First, I would like to pose a question to the audience. What would you do if your friend were captured by aliens? And when I write "aliens" I mean aliens, as in the big-headed big-eyed weird looking creatures you've come to know since childhood. Would you run? Would you go to the police? Would you become an estranged town recluse? This is the premise and pretty much the general theme throughout the first half of "Fire in the Sky."

Located in White Mountains, Arizona, six men are clearing trees in the forest for lumber distribution for a high-profile client. Two of the men are best friends Mike Rogers and Travis Walton, played by Robert Patrick and D.B. Sweeney. As usual, there's always one troublemaker in the group, Allan Dallis, played by Craig Sheffer. The other men play supporting roles with little to no significant dialogue relevant to this review. 

Turning back to the story, while traveling home one night on the job, the men see a mysterious glowing red light not far from the dirt road that they are driving on. Once they get close enough, the ever-curious Travis decides to get out of the truck and snag a front row view of the unidentified flying object hovering above the ground. I kept asking myself why Travis would get out of the truck? Perhaps he is fearless, but this bordered on lunacy if you ask me, especially when all his friends are yelling and pleading with him to get back into the truck. How would you feel if a massive ominious sphere-like object were hovering over you? Am I the only one that would think about getting squashed once gravity takes that thing over? But perhaps Travis is just caught in the trance where he stands there like a deer in headlights, unable to move. His friends on the other hand, they're scared to death, but Travis doesn't seem bothered. With a quick flash of white light, Travis is thrust from his current postion and tossed around like a rag doll. When he hits the ground he's not moving and his friends assume the worst before driving off like crazy hillbillies, complete with the rusty old pickup truck. 

The men tell the police what happened, which results in heavy skepticism and consequently a town that thinks they're living amongst murderers. But soon they'll be proven wrong when Travis calls Mike one night via a payphone - don't worry, he calls Collect, which I wonder how he was even able to manage this considering the state that Mike finds him shortly after. Travis is messed up and he's having flashbacks of his experience that night in the woods. The first few days of his homecoming are terrifying for him as he struggles to sort through the fuzzy recollections from the alien abduction. We come to learn what actually happened on that spacecraft, and it's not at all pretty. Aliens don't play nice, at least not in this film. Travis was poked, prodded, cut, and disected in a chilling scene complete with alien close-ups and skin-crawling operating procedures. Shortly after the big reveal, the viewer is catapulted into Travis' future, which appears normal by all accounts. He is now married with one child, and one on the way. 

The storyline of "Fire in the Sky" was intriguing, but the outcome was rather disappointing. Too much time was spent on the initial struggle of the men trying to convince the townspeople of their innocence. When you already know that they're innocent, it's hard to watch an hour of them continuously pleading their case to others. We get it, we want to know what happened to Travis - that's the interesting part. 

Once Travis arrives on the scene again, the film runs through the motions as if the director was told that the budget had reached its limit. Travis jumps from being a man with seemingly irreparable psychological damage to a man that works hard to support a family, just like any other man. We're left with too many questions. For instance, how did Travis get off the spacecraft? There was heavy implication during his time on the craft that human subjects were not a newly discovered hobby. What did the aliens gain from their investigation? Or are we to assume that these aliens were unintelligable torture seekers who randomly took people and then let them go? With such a strong beginning, it's unfortunate that this film fell so flat in the end. 

Thumbs DOWN

Heartbreakers (2001)

Directed By: David Mirkin

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 123 minutes

"Heartbreakers" surprised me. It was fun, not to be taken too seriously and had a great cast, including Sigourney Weaver (Max Conners), Jennifer Love Hewitt (Page Conners), Ray Liotta (Dean Cumanno), Jason Lee (Jack Withrowe) and Gene Hackman (William B. Tensy).

Max and Page Conners make their living by playing cons... on rich men. The mother/daughter duo use their feminine wiles to lure men into marrying one of them and then set up a scheme to take place shortly after their wedding night that results in a rather quick and clean divorce. That's the way it's always been, until one day the IRS comes knocking on their door. Max hasn't filed taxes in who knows how many years. Her innocent response - "I thought my husbands were supposed to do that." Now that they owe over $300,000 to the big man, they must come up with a con that will pay off their debt and leave them financially set for life. 

So why not Palm Beach? Home of the mega-rich and the ultra-disgusting William B. Tensy, tobacco company billionaire, also known as the Conners' next client. "Heartbreakers" is an adventure in finding the true meaning of happiness in life, and all the little escapades that go along with it. Max doesn't want Page to go off on her own, while Page cannot stand being the understudy to her mother's cons. She wants to be more independent, but can she get a man to fall in love with her without falling in love herself? In the beginning of the film, money is the driving factor for everything these women do, and it's hilarious at times as they use any means necessary to get what they want. Sure, the plot is ridiculous in its own way, but we don't take it seriously anyways. 

I've read some negative reviews about this film, stating something along the lines that Weaver is trying to be younger than she is. My response to this - of course Weaver's character Max is trying to act younger than she really is, that's what makes this film so funny. Did Weaver keep up with the youthful glamour exuded by the curvy little Love Hewitt? Absolutely, and she looked damn good doing it. With supporting roles by Liotta, who as always, plays an excellent gangster, and Hackman, who couldn't be a more convincing rich bastard, "Heartbreakers" is a film that will not only make you smile, but laugh out loud as well. 

Thumbs UP

Cars 2 (2011)

Directed By: John Lasseter & Brad Lewis

Rating: G

Runtime: 106 minutes

Following in the wake of the 2006 ever-popular "Cars" is its sequel, "Cars 2." Still boasting the creative imagination of a car's world, we see the clever gimmicks applied to the automobile as it functions in its own specialized environment - adapted from all the familair human comforts and technological advancements of our time. I believe this is what resulted in the widespread popularity of the first film because not only was the idea original, but it speaks to our American appeals, widely centered on our own personal transportation, meaning we LOVE our cars! 

Whereas the first film explores the story of one car, a hothead speed racer with an ego that could use a little downsizing, "Cars 2" takes a different perspective. With the returning voice talents of Larry the Cable Guy (Mater), Owen Wilson (Lightning McQueen) and Bonnie Hunt (Sally), we feel at home with these characters we have come to adore. The opening scene in the film involves a type of espionage spy mission that takes place on a deep-sea oil rig platform. Immediately we relate this scene to the countless spy movies in the James Bond film series. Though this time, our spy is Fin McMissile, voiced by Michael Caine. 

Back at Radiator Springs, McQueen has recently returned from racing and is reunited with all his old pals. One evening there is a television segment on Mel Dorado about the plight of oil tycoon Sir Miles Axelrod, voiced by Eddie Izzard. Axelrod had gotten lost in the jungle for some reason or other and ended up surviving off of a sustainable fuel he created - somehow. Now Axelrod is promoting his new fuel, call Allinol, by hosting a World Grand Prix. Of course McQueen enters into the competition and before we know it, the gang is flying off to Europe for the race of their lives. 

McQueen is rather hesitant to take Mater with him on the trip because Mater is... well he's a Radiator Springs hillbilly that just wouldn't fit in with all those pish posh European imports. Alas, he takes Mater along anyways and it's a bit disastrous for him. After he loses his first race due to a miscommunication with Mater, he tells the rusty tow truck that the doesn't need his help anymore and a friendship is torn. Meanwhile, McQueen steps down from the film's center stage and in comes Mater, who possesses most of the spotlight throughout the film. If I could relate Mater to a bumbling half-wit spy, I would have to pick Inspector Jacques Clousea played by Peter Sellers in "The Pink Panther" film series. During a restroom break, Mater unknowingly becomes part of an international espionage mission and soon enough, is dragged into the world of high-tech spies and cool gadgetry. Although he is always flubbing things up, it ends up working out for the better every time, thus convincing his spy cohorts, Fin McMissile and Holley Shiftwell, that he's the best damn spy in the business.

So there you have it, "Cars 2" juggles a friendship hanging in the balance as well as a dose of political corruption on the side. The storyline is most definitely taken from bits and pieces of those stories we've already seen or heard of. However, applying such parts to the creative world that exists in this Autoverse is still unique and surely worth a viewing. Kids will love this film, while adults will appreciate the visuals and the subtle laughs throughout. 

Thumbs UP

Machine Gun Preacher (2011)

Directed By: Marc Forster

Rating: R

Runtime: 129 minutes

This film does not rely on originality, it relies on the tragic reality of the civil war in the Sudan. With an overall tone very similar to Martin Campbell's "Beyond Borders" (2003), "Machine Gun Preacher" is a film only to be taken seriously, with little room for a hopeful ending. This is the kind of film that is emotionally draining and visually shocking, because we know this isn't make believe anymore and just because these tragedies don't happen in our backyards doesn't mean they don't exist. Open your eyes and listen, and you will experience a story that touches all our hearts. 

The film stars Gerard Butler, who plays Sam Childers, an ex-convict with a drug problem and a rather dark past that catches up to him on the night he thinks he murders a man out of self-defense (although the situation is a bit more complicated than that). Shortly after his world comes crashing down, Childers turns to God for salvation. Although it is not implicitly stated in the film, the viewer assumes that some time has passed as Childers starts his own construction business, moves the family out of a trailer and into a home, and begins to do mission work in the Sudan. 

The transformations throughout this film are what makes it so effective. We experience Childers' life with his family in the U.S. as well as his newfound family in the Sudan. During this transition, Childers goes from being a bad husband and father, to an inspiration as the Sudanese come to know him as the Machine Gun Preacher. Childers had a lot of sins in his past and turned to the church for salvation. When God reached out to him, he then felt compelled to further God's mission, which led him to the Sudan, where the Lord's Resistance Army (LRA) burns villages, murders innocent people, and kidnaps children as new recruitments to their rebel cause. What is Childers' cause? He builds an orphanage to protect the children, providing them with food, shelter, and a safer environment than the alternative of being alone out there. How serious was he about his cause? Well, he spent nearly every penny he had and nearly broke apart his marriage and family. The end credits to this film indicate that Childers still continues his work in the Sudan, a lifelong commitment to the struggles of everyday life for the Sudanese people. 

The film was well-directed by Forster - showing the parallel lifestyle of Childers was most effective because it can relate to pretty much any audience no matter what background you may come from. With visual images so striking I had to close my eyes at times, Forster holds nothing back, and I'm glad for it. Awareness is something that we choose to accept or ignore. Sometimes it gives us the courage to take action, no matter how big or small. Just remember, every little bit counts!

Thumbs UP

Arabian Nights (2000)

Directed By: Steve Barron

Rating: TV Movie

Runtime: 175 minutes

Let me start by acknowledging that "Arabian Nights" was a made-for-tv movie that aired with two episodes in order to cover the 175-minute feature length. Typically, films that are made for television already have that "low-standards" stigma attached. I must say that I have been pleasantly surprised. 

For starters, the film contains a strong casting including the likes of James Frain (Schahzenan / Harun al-Rashid), Jason Scott Lee (Aladdin), John Leguizamo (Genie of the Lamp / Ring), Dougray Scott (Sultan Shahryar / Amin), Rufus Sewell (Ali Baba) and James Callis (Prince Ahmed). This diverse group of talent handled each of their roles most effectively (and probably had a bit of fun as well).

"Arabian Nights" is a story within a story, which is the reason for the 175-minute runtime. Sultan Shahryar, played by Dougray Scott, has become a monstrous paranoid lunatic after his former wife nearly killed him and then ran away with his brother. Needless to say, she didn't get too far before she was knifed in the back. The Sultan's new wife, Scheherezade, played by Mili Avital, has a gift for storytelling and uses this gift to restore sanity back to the Sultan. It is through her stories that the Sultan begins to relate the tales to his own life and through these lessons, begins to get a handle on his grief, anger, paranoia, etc. Overall, the story was fun and adventurous. If you enjoy sword fights, magic, hidden treasures, flying carpets and a genie of the lamp, then you'll likely enjoy "Arabian Nights."

I give a head nod to Scott, who played a very convincing role of a deranged psychotic Sultan. His facial expressions were definitely initimidating and his actions a bit frightening at times. I was surprised that Scheherezade stuck around long enough to see if there was any semblance of a heart left in him - surely I wouldn't have. As a made-for-tv movie, I commend director Steve Barron for his work. Sure some of the sets and CGI could have used some improvement, but all in all, I enjoyed this little Arabian adventure.

A quick side note, I've discovered that director Chuck Russell will be completing the film "Arabian Nights" to be released in 2014. Currently cast is Liam Hemsworth with rumored cast members including Dwayne Johnson and Anthony Hopkins.

Thumbs UP

The Haunting of Whaley House (2012)

Directed By: Jose Prendes

Rating: Unrated

Runtime: 90 minutes

"The Haunting of Whaley House" was our Scary Movie Night pick. Needless to say, we were shammed! About the only thing well done for this film was the front movie cover (props to the graphic designer). The addition of the "Based on True Events" heading as well as the bold quote of praise is probably the only reason that movie watchers may pluck this off the shelf. Now we've all heard of B movies and I've seen some that are actually good in their own way. I would not classify this film as a B movie. No, it ranks somewhere down under, whatever classification that may be. 

A little background on what you may be or may have already gotten yourself into when viewing this film. Venezulean director Jose Prendes has a preference for writing and directing within the horror genre. His previous directing works include "The Monster Man," "Corpses Are Forever" and "Nannyland." I already have a smirk on my face and I haven't even listed his script credits. Let me just say that Prendes wrote a script for "The Haunting of Winchester House" three years prior to the release of "The Haunting of Whaley House." I'm no writer extraordinaire, but something tells me that you probably shouldn't reuse the words "The Haunting of..." for a new film script. But I'm off topic - I'm two paragraphs in and I haven't even gotten to the film review yet, but I promise you, you're not missing much. 

"The Haunting of Whaley House" has a cast of no-name actors. The plot can be summarized as a bunch of late teens / early twenty-somethings go into a house one night that is supposedly haunted. Their mission objective - to investigate the supernatural. What they end up getting - a night of murder and really really bad acting. I've never seen a film where actors don't know what to do onscreen. Literally, throughout a large majority of the takes inside the house, many actors who didn't have dialogue end up smiling or making odd gestures. One particular actress who does this throughout the entirety of the film is Arielle Brachfeld who plays Vanessa Dane. Not only were her facial expressions just plain freaky at times, she had a huge smile planted on her face during takes where she shouldn't have been smiling. This in itself would have made the film ridiculous enough, but there's more.

In one scene a girl is standing outside of the house, channeling a conversation with a ghost that appears in the window. The ghost apparently tells the girl to pick up an ax, which is conveniently on the ground right near her feet. She grabs the ax and begins to chop herself in the neck while maintaining the goofiest smile that I've ever seen. Then, shortly after this scene is a man and a woman getting ready to go on a date. The man is trying to find a cat to give it food near the house. Why he felt compelled to feed a cat late at night, I have no clue. The voloptuous blonde that is with him attempts to distract him by showing off her breasts, which look as fake, but maybe not as big as Pamela Anderson's silicone sensations. When her date isn't responding, she just walks away and that's the last we see of her. He, on the other hand, ends up impaling himself on a stationary water pump. What does this all mean? Nothing - absolutely nothing. "The Haunting of Whaley House" is a film that is laughable due to its preposterous attempt at creating horror that actually might scare someone. The only thing scary about this film was the acting!

Thumbs DOWN